My birthday was Sunday. It's not a big deal but its nice to hear from family a quick happy birthday. Maybe a card from my grandparents. Maybe some thought into  a present if you are going to get me one.

Yeah, none of that. Maybe its because I had a family get together on Friday night and they felt it was enough. I got checks. Nice gesture, but isnt the saying its the thought that counts? Seriously, Im not hard to buy for. An OU T-Shirt. I only have 2 and only one of them fits me. Maybe some golf balls. Something small for the camaro like a hose kit. These are all things everyone knows I want but they take the lazy unthinking way out. Sure I've given gift certs or cash I also didnt put much thought into what I was doing.

My inlaws like to act like they care about my birthday. They don't. My sister in laws birthday is the day before mine. I once went to a 'combined' birthday party at their house and not one mention that is was my party as well to the guests in attendance. I got cash from them as well.

Hell even my wife got me a key ring that clips to my belt loop. WTF? Am I a janitor?

Two calls on my birthday from family. Much appriciated. Not even cards from the grandparents

I just said to hell with them all bought a trendy watch and am looking for a practice amp for my guitar.

Just one thing to say to my family either think about what you are getting me or dont get me anything. A 12 of Guiness would have been better than a check.

10.Chicks showing their breasts to the band. Yes its always a crowd pleaser but come up with something original. It was cool when your mom did it.

9. The band saying "If it weren't for you guys we wouldn't be here". Thanks captain obvious and here I always thought bands that didn't sell records got the big tour busses....

8. Guitar solos. Wow you can thrash on the guitar, but you are no Steve Vai or Eddie so just put it away and play another song.

7. Meat heads in the mosh pit. Good for you Frat boy you just shoved a skinny long haired 15 year old down. No wonder you score all the dudes... er chicks.

6. The encore. Just say Ill be back in 5 minutes I need to cool down and grab some water. Stop acting like you MIGHT come back out.

5. Weed. If your gonna get high why not sit in your car or living room and crank up a CD and not pay $40 - $60 to go to a show to get stoned.

4. Crowd sing along. If I wanted to hear a bunch of no talents singing your stuff I'd record myself in the shower.

3. $4 beer. Not really a cliche I just hate paying $4 for a beer.

2. Giving the horns at a pop rock concert. Unless its Slayer is there a point?

1. Lighters. Yes it was cool in Bon Jovi videos, you can stop now.